


~Distance~

by Nickoliz_B1



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Karasuno, Karasuno Family, M/M, Minor Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio, Nekoma, Post-Time Skip, Pre-Time Skip, Sad Yamaguchi Tadashi, Training Camp, Tsukishima Kei & Yamaguchi Tadashi Friendship, Tsukishima Kei Being an Asshole, Tsukishima Kei is Bad at Feelings, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-25
Updated: 2020-08-25
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:42:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26103643
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nickoliz_B1/pseuds/Nickoliz_B1
Summary: After the last training camp, Tsukishima refuses to believe his feelings.He doesn't want to say it's true.But when he starts dating that person, everything else starts falling apart.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio, Kuroo Tetsurou/Tsukishima Kei, Tsukishima Kei/Yamaguchi Tadashi
Comments: 2
Kudos: 26





	1. Chapter 1

I refuse to believe it. It’s probably just confusion. I hate him. He’s stupid, idiotic, and a total dumbass. Him with Bokuto is even worse. He is the worst and yet for some reason, I want to text him. I want to ask about his day. I want to see how he is. I want him to be okay. I don’t like him though. I can’t like him. I would never like anyone as stupid as him. Yet, I want to be with him. What is wrong with me?

  
  


I take off the Nekoma jacket Kuroo gave me last night. I didn’t even tell him I was cold and he was already throwing it at me. I hate it. I refuse to wear it after that night. I’ll give it back tomorrow. “Hey, Tsukki!” Yamaguchi says, coming into the club room. Hinata and Kageyama follow behind him. “Is that Kuroo’s jacket?” Hinata asks. I look down at the jacket and nod, “I don’t even know why he gave it to me. I think I might burn it.” I tell them. “Do you like him, Tsukki?” Yamaguchi asks me. I laugh and shake my head, “As if I could like that dumbass.” Kageyama smirks, “You wouldn’t have taken that jacket if you didn’t and you would’ve burned it by now if you had the intent.” I huff, “No, I don’t like him. Just because I am being nice doesn’t mean I like him.” I tell them and Hinata rolls his eyes, “Sure. And also, whenever you call someone a dumbass that means you like them. That’s what Kageyama told me.” I laugh, “Only the King does that.” Kageyama scowls and Hinata frowns. “Guys, if Tsukki says he doesn’t like them then we should believe him. Tsukki isn’t the type to lie.” Yamaguchi defends me. I nod at him and he smiles brightly. “Let’s just get ready for practice.” I tell them and we get ready to leave.

  
  


When practice ends, Yamaguchi and I get ready to go home. We walk home together but I have to take a detour today to drop off Kuroo’s jacket. “Hey, Yamaguchi?” “What’s up, Tsukki?” Yamaguchi responds right away. We are stopped before I have to go to Kuroo’s so we will have to go different directions after this. “Thanks for standing up for me. It’s weird having you be the one standing up for us.” I tell him and he laughs, “Of course, Tsukki! I know you wouldn’t lie to me!” I frown and shake my head, “I’m sorry about that Yamaguchi. I don’t want to say it but I think Hinata and Kageyama were right.” His eyes widen and he frowns, “You like him?” I nod and he smiles, “I’m proud of you, Tsukki. Does this mean you are going to confess to him or something?” I sigh and shrug, “Maybe. If it feels right.” Yamaguchi nods and hugs me, “I’m so proud of you, Tsukki. I’m happy for you.” I smile and hug him back, “Thank you.” 

I get to Kuroo’s house and knock on the door to drop off the jacket. “Hey hey- oh, Tsukki, what’s up?” I grab the jacket out of my bag and Kuroo smiles, “You know you can keep it for a while so you don’t forget me you know?” “What makes you think I’ll forget you?” I ask and immediately regret it. “Aww I must be super important if you won’t forget me!” Kuroo exclaims. “More like super annoying.” I mutter and Kuroo laughs it off. “Well you can still keep the jacket. It will remind you of me and, well, it gives you a reason to see me again.” Kuroo says, ears turning a bit red. I can feel the blood rushing to my ears but I brush it off, “But wouldn’t you rather give it to someone like Kenma? Don’t you like him?” I ask. Kuroo looks down before smiling, “I used to like Kenma but he has a thing for shrimpy. I like someone else now.” I nod my head staring at the jacket in my hand. “Should I go then?” I ask. Kuroo looks back into his house before closing the door behind him, “I would say no but my parents are home. I’ll walk you home though.” “It’s like an hour away.” “Don’t care.”

We get off the train and start making our way to my house. I have Kuroo’s jacket on again. I sort of like wearing it. It’s nice. “You look really good in my jacket.” Kuroo says looking me up and down. I look away to hide my red face and huff, “It’s practically the same as my school jacket.” Kuroo laughs and throws an arm around me, “Yeah but this is MY jacket you are wearing. That makes you look ten times more attractive.” He whispers the last part in my ear and I shiver. “This is my house.” I say stopping. Kuroo stops too and sighs, “Well, maybe I’ll see you later.” Kuroo says. “Maybe.” I say. I move away from his arm and start making my way to my house. Before I open the gate Kuroo grabs my arm and turns me around towards him. “Wait!” he says. I cross my arms and stand there as he stands quietly, looking awkward. “What?” I ask. He sighs and then pulls me close and kisses me. It’s nice. But short. Kuroo pulls away smiling, “Will you go out with me?” he asks. I nod and he hugs me. I hug him back for once and hide my face in his shoulder. I’ve never been happier. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


The next few weeks at school, I’m starting to feel more alone. I get to see Kuroo at least 3 times a week which is good enough for now. However, I haven’t got a lot of people to hang out with at school anymore. Yamaguchi has been hanging out with Hinata and Yachi more recently. I know Yamaguchi always though Yachi was cute so he’s probably trying to win her heart. Hinata is with Kageyama so he probably wouldn’t try to ruin that. I just feel sad that Yamaguchi isn’t hanging out with me as much. I don’t think I said anything too mean and usually he knows I’m joking if I did. I’ve talked to him before and he said he was fine. He didn’t ever tell me he liked Yachi either which makes me a bit sad. We are still best friends. Or I hope we are. 

At practice, I go on my phone to text Kuroo a bit. Kuroo is complaining like usual. This week we haven’t seen much of each other because of volleyball and games and stuff. Kuroo loves attention so when I’m not able to give him a lot of it, he gets mad. We have little fights every once and a while but every healthy relationship does. Right now, Kuroo’s biggest problem is our distance. Kuroo doesn’t like long distance. Not to mention, he goes off to college next year. He worries out our future. I want him to trust us but I’m not sure he does. I think what we have can last it. I know my feelings could but I’m not sure he is willing to do that. Kuroo is a very needy person. I have been trying to keep up with his needs but every once and a while, I pretend I don’t see the text. “Tsukishima! Back to practice!”

* * *

  
  


Our three month is coming up and we have made it though most our problems. We fight a lot. We don’t text as much. Kuroo hasn’t even called me once this week. I know this will pay off though. Once school is over, this relationship will be worth it. It is worth fighting for. I just need someone to talk to. Yamaguchi and I haven’t actually talked in what feels like months. I feel like I don’t even know what’s going on with his life. I know for sure he likes Yachi. He hasn’t told me but I can see it. He watches her carefully. He looks at her like Hinata looks at Kageyama. It’s cute. I want to talk to him about it. I want us to talk about our problems again. I want to be real friends again. The best friends we were in middle school. Just as it used to be. 

  
  


“Hey, Yamaguchi!” I call. Yamaguchi looks back at me confused and waits for me to catch up. “We haven’t walked home together in a while.” I tell him and he nods. “How have you been?” I ask and Yamaguchi sighs, “I’ve been better. Just tired I guess.” I nod and sigh, “I get that. I’ve been having problems with Kuroo.” I tell him. He looks over, interested so I continue, “Kuroo and I have been fighting a lot. About distance, my attitude, Kuroo’s need for attention, school, and clubs. Makes it hard to see each other and be together.” I tell him. He nods and sighs, “If it’s hurting you, then don’t go through it. You can always find someone better.” Yamaguchi tells me and I shake my head, “I want him though. It hurts now but I know it’s going to be worth it. I know it will be worth fighting for.” Yamaguchi sighs and smiles, “If you think that then I’m sure it will be worth it.” “Yeah, I just wish it wasn’t so goddamn hard. I’m sure you have the same thing with Yachi.” I say and Yamaguchi tilts his head confused. “Don’t you like Yachi?” I ask. Yamaguchi laughs, “No I don’t like Yachi. She’s just one of my best friends.” “But I thought-” I start but Yamaguchi cuts me off, “No. You thought. Maybe if you talked to me and asked me you would know. Instead, you completely forgot about me for the past three months because you only care about your boyfriend now. And now that you guys are fighting you come to me acting like we are friends so you can complain about your problems. That’s not right Tsukki. I am not going to do that now. Some people have it way worse than you and you wouldn’t even notice because you are too busy thinking about yourself and your problems.” Yamaguchi yells. We are stopped now and Yamaguchi looks mad. “I’m sorry. I didn’t realize. Do you want to talk about it?” I ask. “Do I want to talk about it? That’s all you will say. I didn’t realize. Well no duh! You didn’t realize that your childhood friend has been in love with you for the past three years of our lives and instead chooses a guy you’ve known for three months over him! That’s pain, Tsukki! That’s when it hurts! And you know what hurts even more?” Yamaguchi yells jabbing a finger at my chest, “Having him be so oblivious that he doesn’t even notice when his best friend is hurting the most.” 

Yamaguchi leaves me standing in the middle of the street alone. He was right. Everything he said was true. He confessed to me too. He is in love with me and I couldn’t even tell. Or maybe I did know and I told myself he didn’t to make myself feel better. I don’t know. Either way, I feel terrible. I am terrible. I hurt my best friend this much and I couldn’t even tell. He doesn’t even consider me his friend anymore. I’m alone now. I need someone. I need Kuroo. 

I get a train to Kuroo’s and make my way there as fast as I can. However, when I arrive, Kuroo isn’t the one to open the door. “What do you want?” Kenma asks. He has on one of Kuroo’s hoodies and has a game in his hand. “Where is Kuroo?” I ask. Kenma shrugs, “Not home yet.” “How did you get in then?” I ask and Kenma pulls out a keychain, “I have his key.” I nod and walk away. I don’t know what that means but I’m mad. Childhood friends that share keys? Who does that? Wearing each others hoodies? That’s what boyfriends do. Staying at his house while he’s not home? That’s not normal. Having some of your own stuff at his house? That can’t just be friends. I don’t get jealous easily but if it’s about Kenma I will. I know Kenma and him have history. I know he used to like Kenma. He said Kenma liked Hinata but for all I know that could be a lie. He could’ve been cheating on me this entire time. He hasn’t called me in a week and rarely ever texts me nowadays. He doesn’t think we will last in college. Him and Kenma would last though. They are only a year apart. Maybe it’d be better if they were together. He texts Kenma more than me. He sees Kenma more than me. I have never asked but I’m 100% sure he would pick Kenma over me. Maybe this is for the best. I send one last text to Kuroo before blocking him. This is okay for now. 

When I get off the train, I don’t stop at my house. I find myself in front of Yamaguchi’s. I need to apologize. I need to talk to him. He likes me and maybe I could like him. I just need someone right now and I hope it can be him. I knock on the door and Yamaguchi answers. He’s in his pajamas and looks tired. “What the fuck do you want Tsukki?” Yamaguchi asks. “I broke up with Kuroo.” I tell him. He sighs and steps outside closing the door behind him. “It wasn’t because of what I told you right?” he asks. I shake my head, “No. I think it’s for the best we broke up. It wasn’t working.” He nods and sighs, “Are you happy now?” I shrug, “I don’t know. I don’t feel anything.” I tell him. Yamaguchi nods before walking towards the street with me. “I’ll walk you home.” Yamaguchi tells me. “No. I want to stay with you.” I say. Yamaguchi sighs and shakes his head, “No. I’m mad at you. I know if I keep you here I will become your rebound. I want to walk you home and leave you there. That way your last memory of me is happier than us fighting.” Yamaguchi tells me. I frown, “What do you mean last memory?” I ask. “Nothing bad. I just think it’s better if we aren’t friends for a bit. Or, aren’t close.” Yamaguchi tells me. He starts walking and I follow. “So, we aren’t going to be friends after this?” I ask and Yamaguchi shakes his head, “It’s not good for me. I should try to be happy and you should too. It’ll be better if we aren’t friends. And if it doesn’t work then we can be friends again. We will just have to see how it goes.” I nod and we arrive at my house. “So this is the last time we will be friends?” I ask and Yamaguchi nods. “Can I have one last hug?” I ask. Yamaguchi hugs me and I can feel tears soak into my shirt. I start tearing up too but I smile as we pull away. “Bye, Yams.” “Bye, Tsukki.” 


	2. Chapter 2

  
  
  


It’s so weird to see him again. To act as friends again. I’ll try again. If he will. I want to try again. Maybe I overreacted. Maybe we could’ve stayed friends. God I wish we did. It just hurt so much back then. 

* * *

**4 years ago**   
  
  


“Hey, Tsukki!” I say as I come into the club room. Hinata and Kageyama are behind me but I don’t pay attention to them. What catches my attention is the jacket you have with you. “Is that Kuroo’s jacket?” Hinata asks. You look down at the jacket and nod, “I don’t even know why he gave it to me. I think I might burn it.” you say but I know better. “Do you like him, Tsukki?” I ask. I know you too well. You laugh it off and shake your head, “As if I could like that dumbass.” Kageyama smirks, “You wouldn’t have taken that jacket if you didn’t and you would’ve burned it by now if you had the intent.” you huff, “No, I don’t like him. Just because I am being nice doesn’t mean I like him.” you say. I know you like him. I can already tell. You wouldn’t defend yourself this much. Your smile is fake. Your laugh is fake. I know you too well. I wish you knew me as well as I knew you. But you don’t and here you are, fake laughing and trying to deny your crush on Kuroo. “Only the King does that.” Kageyama scowls and Hinata frowns. “Guys, if Tsukki says he doesn’t like them then we should believe him. Tsukki isn’t the type to lie.” I defend. You nod at me and I can’t help but smile. “Let’s just get ready for practice.” you say and we get ready to leave. As we walk to the gym I can feel the tension. You never lie to me. I know you will tell me when you are ready. I just hope I’m prepared for the pain. 

  
  


When practice ends, we get ready to go home. We walk home together but you ‘have’ to take a detour to drop off Kuroo’s jacket. I know it’s just an excuse to go see him. You would’ve burned it by now if you hated it. “Hey, Yamaguchi?” “What’s up, Tsukki?” I respond as quick as I can. We are stopped before you turn to go to Kuroo’s. We will have to go different directions after this and I know it will break my heart. “Thanks for standing up for me. It’s weird having you be the one standing up for us.” you say. I laugh it off and lie, “Of course, Tsukki! I know you wouldn’t lie to me!” I thought you could tell I was lying. You frown and shake your head but don’t say the words I want to hear, “I’m sorry about that Yamaguchi. I don’t want to say it but I think Hinata and Kageyama were right.” My eyes widen and I frown. I know what’s coming now, “You like him?” You nod and I put on my act. I smile for you, “I’m proud of you, Tsukki. Does this mean you are going to confess to him or something?” you sigh and shrug, “Maybe. If it feels right.” I smile again and hugs you. It might be the last hug I get, “I’m so proud of you, Tsukki. I’m happy for you.” You smile and hug me back, “Thank you.” As I turn to walk away, you can’t see the tears in my eyes. You can’t hear the cracking of my voice. You can’t see the breaking of my heart. 

The next thing I know, you are dating Kuroo. It hurts when i get the call. You seemed so happy though. So I went along with it. I cheered for you. I laughed with you. I put on my fakest smile. And you didn’t see through any of it. So when I went home that night, I cried. I cried for hours. It hurts when I, who has loved you for years, am so easily thrown aside. I stop hanging out with you. I get in a fight with you. And then we say our last goodbye as friends. I think that hurt the most. You were so vulnerable. You could’ve easily become mine but I would’ve just been a rebound to you. I didn’t want that. So I left. For you. For me. We still saw each other at school and said stuff in volleyball but it wasn’t the same. It was never the same. How could it be? I loved you and to you, I was just a rebound. I was the second choice. I would always be a second choice. And I couldn’t change it. 

* * *

**Current**   
  


When the game ends, all the first years head out of drinking. I see Tsukishima and I smile and wave. He smiles back and I can feel myself blush. After all these years, nothing has changed for me. I don’t know about Tsukki but I feel like I haven’t changed a bit. Yachi says I’ve changed but that’s because she’s close. She was there for it all. She helped me when Tsukki was gone. She is the person I call my best friend now. I wish I could say it’s Tsukki but we stopped our friendship that day after Tsukki’s first breakup. 

When we get to the bar, we start drinking and the jokes and games come around. “Okay but who proposed?” Yachi asks and Hinata bursts out laughing, “It was me!” he screams frantically. Kageyama face palms but we can see the love in his eyes. “You have to tell me all about it!” Yachi demands. “Noooo!” Kageyama complains but Hinata starts his story. I look over at Tsukki and he’s just staring at me. I wave him over and he moves to my other side. “Hey, Tsukki. It’s been a while.” I say and Tsukki smiles, “Still with the nickname?” he asks and I laugh, “It’s never leaving!” 

The night goes by fast and I actually get to talk with Tsukki. I knew about Tsukki’s volleyball team but I got the inside scoop from Tsukki. He even invited me to one of his games. I told Tsukki about my career now and how college life was. We can agree that college sucked. We also listened to the story of Hinata trying to propose to Kageyama and accidentally dropping the ring into a lake which they had to fish out together. Hinata thought it was hilarious and Kageyama was so embarrassed. I’m jealous they have such a perfect relationship. They passed through all the obstacles together and now they are here. We are all so proud and got invites to the wedding. Just as we are leaving to go home, Tsukki calls me over. “What’s up?” I ask and he smiles, “Can we go to coffee sometime?” he asks. I smile and nod. “Coffee sounds nice.”

  
  


“Where to start. . . I’m sorry. I was an asshole back then. I hope I’ve changed somehow but I do want to try to be friends again.” Tsukki says as we sit down for coffee. “Aww! Tsukki, I already forgave you. I want to try this again too. As friends or whatever we are.” I tell him. Tsukki smiles and grabs me hand across the table, “But I really am sorry. I don’t think of you as a second choice. I was. . . lonely back then. I needed someone but I know now that I was wrong. Honestly, I should’ve just stayed with you. I might be oblivious but I’m not stupid. I would’ve noticed at some point.” Tsukki claims. I laugh and smirk, “Yeah sure. You couldn’t read me at all. I, however, could read you like a book.” I tell him. He smirks, “Oh really? Is that so?” “Yes it is.” I say. We both laugh and I sigh, “I missed this. I missed us.” I tell him. He sighs and nods, “Me too. You really were the best friend I ever had.” I smile, “You were mine too.” 

“You know. . . I was hurting a lot without you. At first I thought it was because of Kuroo but I know it was because of you.” Tsukki tells me. I nod and sigh, “Yeah I was hurting too. I used Yachi and Hinata to hide the pain but it still hurt to be without you.” He nods and we stay silent for a bit. “Please don’t let it happen again.” Tsukki says. I look up and he looks vulnerable. Like the night he and Kuroo broke up but not the same type of pain. It’s different this time and for once, I can’t read it. “Yeah. I think we need each other more than we think.” I say, trying to read Tsukki. It’s weird not being able to read him. It’s probably because of our time apart. I can still read certain things but this is a bit too deep for me. I can only wonder what is hurting now. “Yes please. I think I need you in my life.” Tsukki says. I smile and nod, “Me too.” 

We finish and head outside to leave. “This is a see you later right?” Tsukki asks and I smile, “Yep.” I say. Tsukki nods and goes through his bag to grab out his keys. I frown and look around. When I see no ones around I grab Tsukki and pull his face up, “Hm?” Tsukki asks. I leave a kiss on his cheek before turning and leaving. “Yamaguchi! You can’t just do that and leave!” Tsukki yells after me. I giggle and turn to wave, “Yes I can! You’ll just have to get me back next time!” I yell. Tsukki smiles and turns even more red, “See you later!” he waves and I close the car door behind me. As soon as the door closes, my face turns red instantly and the confidence I had out there turns to embarrassment. I kissed Tsukki on the cheek. He’s going to kill me. I hope I didn’t get the wrong impression by this coffee but he didn’t seem to hate it. Maybe he liked it. My phone buzzes and I smile as I read the message Tsukki left for me. 

**Tsukki**

Before you start overreacting (because I can read you) I did like it. 

See you next time! <3

  
  
  
  


I smile down and respond right away. Maybe this isn’t such a bad thing to start again. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!!

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


End file.
